JANUARY 31, 2004

Twenty-two weeks

Did I even say in here that Aaron and Jenn actually designed, created and hand-held the process of publishing this site? First of all, there's no way I would be able to come up with this cool of a design, and second of all I have this kind of wierd feeling about assuming that people will want to read it. They've been so encouraging and, well, take-charge, about it, though, that - here we are! Gigantic thanks to them! Also, speaking of Aaron, don't forget to check out the "Long Song Playing" link to the right, which is the song Aaron wrote and performed (with my brother Adam singing at the live version - this one is Aaron singing) at our wedding. It's so awesome.

Jim is out cross-country skiing right now. Check out our Winter Wonderland...

I noticed in yoga this week that I have to keep my knees apart in Child's Pose in order to fit my belly. For the last four months of going to prenatal yoga, I've been the only one in the class that didn't have to "make room for my belly" in the various poses. I've arrived.

Started spotting a little this last week. I just hate this whole spotting thing. Mickie says to expect it - I might just be one of those people that spots sometimes. But everything I read says it can be an indicator of preterm labor. I really never expected this stressful component of pregnancy. I guess I always imagined this blissful, ethereal feeling of a growing belly and baby and spending my days daydreaming about cuddling our little angel. Mostly now, I just spend my days fighting off irrational fears of what could happen. I hope this isn't foreshadowing for how I'll be in parenting. Ugh.

I keep promising my Mom, Leone, that I'll take pictures of my belly as I grow. Here's one we took December 8th or so (I know, it's a bit old - I'm about 15 weeks in this picture) and we should have a new one coming in the next few weeks. The major disadvantage of not having a digital camera is you have to wait until you fill a roll of film to develop the pictures and then get to post them.

Don't look if you don't want to see bare belly... it's really not all that cute at this point anyway (except for Scout).

JANUARY 24, 2004

The builder-designer came by today to drop off preliminary plans and discuss the house remodel. Seems for our budget, we can either add a master bedroom or make the upstairs into two bedrooms with one bath, but not both.

Of course, now we're discussing a budget increase of 25% so we can get it all done. We've also gone from adding 600 square feet to adding 900 square feet. You can see where this is going. Beware.

New plans to arrive early next week.

Saw Something's Got to Give with Terry and Harold. It's a rare movie that I am hoping won't end after two hours. Must see.

JANUARY 21, 2004

What a roller coaster weekend! We had this fun trip to Southern California planned for a while. We were thinking it would be our last airline travel before the baby arrives. We'd see Greg, May and Ryan (my brother and his family), Tam (a very close friend), and Pete, Debbie, Isaac & Caleb (also good friends) all in one long weekend trip. We were really looking forward to it!

Just a crazy stream of events. We arrive late Friday night at Pete & Debbie's and, aside from being an hour late, all's fine. We even had a very pleasant exchange on the rental car shuttle when we arrived at the airport with a woman with a four month old baby (which I guessed was nine months old (wishful thinking) and Jim guessed right on) who assured us parenthood is a blessed experience. In comes Scott, a flamboyant airline employee, who begs us not to name our child after a city or location or any of the "crazy yuppy names out there now." "What ever happened to good, solid names like Scott?!" Advice and sentiment abounds when you're expecting.

Anyway, just as we are about to embark on our breakfast adventure on Saturday morning, I find I'm spotting. It feels like someone took a cannonball and dropped it onto my heart. Ever the control freak (of my social behavior anyway), I calmly tell Jim and we make a plan to get internet access and check out what this might mean. We have both done enough reading to know it's not what you hope to happen. I find stuff - blah, blah, blah - then, "scant bleeding over a few weeks can indicate early signs of late stage miscarriage." I won't describe my visions and imaginations. Just get it I was totally freaked. So, we called the doctor (our midwife was not on duty) and I was told to "lay low" - fun house guest. The next day, when it was still there, nothing had changed, so they told us to go to the emergency room. At this point, May and Greg are expecting us for dinner. We called to let them know. The emergency people at UCLA sent me to Labor and Delivery and they did a bunch of tests. Debbie met us at the hospital, unexpectedly, and brought us two cold waters. Amazing what a cold water from a friend can do at a time lake that. Turns out all was okay and I'm just one of those people that had a bit of spotting. So, there's that.

Suddenly, I am more aware than I could have possibly been how much I absolutely love this baby. I already understand why a mom would literally do anything to take care of her baby.

We arrived late to Greg and May's, had a great, relaxing visit for half of the next day then I got sick (yea, like throwing up and having to lay in bed all night sick.) May made amazing dinner, enough for twelve people, and Jim had to eat both of our shares (and he did.)

In between the drama and trauma, we really did enjoy visiting with everyone. The visit with Tam went almost entirely smoothly as far as my body is concerned, which was a blessing. I just am so grateful we were with good friends and family so we could have all this freak out and be supported.

Now, I've decided we're going to plan a trip to Hawaii.

JANUARY 15, 2004

Saw Mickie today. I hate her scale. Better news, my fundus (how did it EVER get that name?) measurement is 20 cm. She says that's about right. I wonder if you have a baseline fundus measurement... I mean, do you only have a fundus when you're pregnant or does everyone have a fundus? It feels like something you don't just ask people, either way. Like it's private or something.

Baby's heartbeat is a rain dance of perfection. She or he is a fantastic martial artist, too, with excellent aim at the heartbeat monitor when it's on my belly. Good news, as I have big plans for Mom and Baby karate classes.

JANUARY 12, 2004

Met with a builder and designer team today about our house remodel. They threw ideas around, talked numbers, shared ideas and used a tape measure. Now, that's what I'm talking about! Of course, they didn't tell us if we can really do this thing yet. They'll drop off preliminary plans "in a few weeks." Fine.

JANUARY 8, 2004

Met with a remodel designer today. While we love our little 924 square foot house, it's starting to feel crampy with just my new burgeoning belly. We're pretty sure the baby will appreciate a bit of breathing room (though it'll be hard to get his or her daddy to step four feet from him or her, I suspect. Hope she or he has high affection tolerance.)

Nice woman, but still no idea what a remodel will cost or entail. Think we'll search around a bit.

JANUARY 6, 2004

Isn't s/he perfect?????? Nice and healthy - in fact, s/he's so big, they think we may be a week further along than originally thought - possibly a few days shy of 20 weeks. Hmmm...

Here's Troy, our comedian ultrasound tech: "Wow, this is the biggest head I've ever seen in an ultrasound!" Hee he he hee heee!

I'm proud to say, I didn't even flinch. I just figured -big head, big brain. Turns out Troy was joshing around with us.

JANUARY 1, 2004

Happy New Year!

At 11:40pm last night I was brushing my teeth. Jim says, "Why are you brushing your teeth?" I said, "Because I want to have them brushed when it hits midnight so I can just run up and go to bed." He says, "Well, aren't we going to toast the New Year?" I say, "Well, I have some pregnancy tea left, can't I just toast with that?" We could have gone out for New Year's celebrations. We had a couple of options. We just didn't feel like it. Instead, we made pasta (no, not from scratch), drank some sparkling pear cider with dinner, ate ice cream and watched Freaky Friday. We watched the ball drop in Time Square, had a romantic Happy New Year kiss, wished Happy New Year to our baby and Scout, and I literally ran up the stairs to bed and was asleep by 12:15 or so. Are we ready for kids, or what?